After seven years of brave, full-throated opposition to the Affordable Care Act, the Republicans have unveiled their vision for health care in America. TrumpCare is a brilliant bill that offers bold solutions to the biggest health-care issues we face as a nation.
First: Too many Americans have health insurance. Mick Mulvaney, Trump’s Office of Management and Budget director, has made it clear that “insurance is not the end goal” of the Republicans’ health-insurance legislation. TrumpCare will ensure that 11 million Americans covered under Medicaid will lose their health insurance within the first two years. Longer term, the prospect of taking health insurance away from Americans is even brighter. TrumpCare’s funding provisions won’t work, so it’s entirely possible that all Americans currently covered by the ACA will lose their insurance when the TrumpCare goes into a predictable death spiral.
Second: The richest Americans, the neediest and most neglected sector of society, will finally get critical relief as their premiums are reduced dramatically.
Third: Elderly Americans on fixed incomes, who are killing this country with their outrageous demands for special treatment, will finally be appropriately punished with higher premiums.
Fourth: Women, that bewildering segment of society that insists beyond all reason that they have access to birth control, maternity care, pediatric dental and vision care, will be brought back to the real world. Insurance companies will no longer be required to cover such incidentals and “nice to haves.”
Fifth: Health-care-company CEOs will no longer have their freedom infringed upon by un-American salary caps. The GOP bill ensures that these brilliant business leaders will finally be allowed, just like other American CEOs, to grant themselves enormous salaries that in no way reflect their performance.
Sixth: Health-care fraud committed by lottery winners. Six pages in the bill are devoted to ensuring that lottery winners are not provided with health insurance. Finally!
Our new President is really stepping up to the plate and asserting his innovative, clear-eyed vision for the health-care crisis. Just yesterday he told Congressional Republicans that he didn’t care which health-care bill they passed as long as they passed SOMETHING.
And the GOP Congressional leadership has achieved what many thought was impossible—the crafting of a TrumpCare bill that has been universally condemned by all stakeholders (conservative Republicans, moderate Republicans, Tea-Party Republicans, all Democrats, health-care companies, the American Hospital Association, AARP, the American Medical Association, health-care experts, the Koch brothers, the real media (Breitbart), and the lamestream media (all news outlets except for Breitbart). You know you have a good bill when everyone is against it. The Republicans really ARE bringing the country together.
All the naysayers who contend that the anti-government Republican Party is no good at governing and that Donald Trump was completely bullshitting the country about his health-care vision have been totally silenced, probably forever, by this week’s jaw-dropping TrumpCare blitzkreig .
Now that the pesky health-care problem has been solved, it’s on to new challenges: reforming the tax code, giving the Russians and the banks whatever they want, taking immigrant children away from their mothers, making America less safe by taking TSA and Coast Guard funds to build a Mexican border wall, getting Trump trademarks for escort services approved in China, blaming everything on Obama, dismantling public education, and launching new wars with North Korea and the scientific community.
